Author Topic: Fun, Jokes and more ....  (Read 5416 times)

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Offline SEARCHER

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Fun, Jokes and more ....
« on: 30 December 2013 à 09:11:31 »
 :D




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« Last Edit: 19 January 2014 à 15:31:46 by SEARCHER »
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Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #1 on: 30 December 2013 à 09:15:08 »
 :D

A man is talking to God.

 The man: "God, how long is a million years?"
 God: "To me, it's about a minute."
 The man: "God, how much is a million dollars?"
 God: "To me it's a penny."
 The man: "God, may I have a penny?"
 God: "Wait a minute."


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Offline ousermaatre

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #2 on: 30 December 2013 à 11:21:46 »
 :ptdr: :ptdr: :ptdr: :ptdr:

Offline sysadm@nbg

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #3 on: 30 December 2013 à 14:53:50 »
Armageddon was yesterday. Today we have a serious problem ...  :electric:
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Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #4 on: 30 December 2013 à 15:20:20 »
 :D




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« Last Edit: 17 January 2014 à 08:58:41 by SEARCHER »
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Offline modesti

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #5 on: 30 December 2013 à 17:28:58 »
Another one...
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Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity and other variables, the computer will do as it damn well pleases. (Harvard's Law, as Applied to Computers)

Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #6 on: 31 December 2013 à 07:15:55 »
 :D




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« Last Edit: 31 December 2013 à 07:23:53 by SEARCHER »
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Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #7 on: 01 January 2014 à 08:27:56 »
 :D

This old man in his eighties got up and was putting on his coat.

His wife said, “Where are you going ? ”

He said, “I’m going to the doctor. ”

And she said, “Why? Are you sick? ”

“No, he said. “I’m going to get me some of those new

Viagra pills. ”

So his wife got up out of her rocker and was putting

on her sweater and he said, “Where are you going? ”

She said, “I’m going to the doctor too. ”

He said, “Why? ”

She said, “If you’re going to start using that rusty

old thing again, I’m going to get a tetanus shot. ”



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« Last Edit: 02 January 2014 à 16:14:47 by SEARCHER »
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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #8 on: 02 January 2014 à 16:15:52 »
 :D

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, Holmes said: ”Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see?"

Watson said, "I see millions and millions of stars."

Holmes: "And what does that tell you?"

Watson: "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorogically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"

Holmes: "Somebody stole our tent."


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Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #9 on: 03 January 2014 à 18:50:52 »
 :D

Genie joke

 A woman is walking along a beach when she finds an old oil lamp.
 She picks it up and rubs it, and out comes a genie.

 The genie says to the woman, "Thank you for freeing me from the oil lamp.
 I will grant you three wishes, but whatever you wish for, your horrible ex-husband will get twice as much. What is your first wish?"

 The woman says, "I'd like a million dollars in my bank account, please!"

 The genie says, "You now have a million dollars in your bank account,
 and your ex-husband now has two million dollars. What is your second wish?"

 The woman says, "I've always wanted a nice car. I'd like a brand new
 Rolls-Royce, please!"

 The genie says, "You now have a new Rolls-Royce in your garage
 at home, and your ex-husband now has two new Rolls-Royces.
 What is your third wish?"

 The woman thought for a while and then said, "I'd like you to remove one
 of my kidneys, please!"


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Offline modesti

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #10 on: 03 January 2014 à 19:19:25 »
Let's get motivated to crunch on Simap...  :gniak: :gniak:
Last Unicorn of L'Alliance Francophone
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Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity and other variables, the computer will do as it damn well pleases. (Harvard's Law, as Applied to Computers)

Offline SEARCHER

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #11 on: 04 January 2014 à 12:35:05 »
 :D




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Offline Duke of Buckingham SETI.USA

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #12 on: 15 January 2014 à 23:52:53 »
The end of the world was cancelled for Portugal, we have no money for such a big event...

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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #13 on: 16 January 2014 à 15:30:32 »
 :D




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Re: Fun, Jokes and more ....
« Reply #14 on: 17 January 2014 à 08:57:22 »
 :D




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